Posts

Showing posts from 2015
A couple of things to get off my chest from yesterday, with the added coincidence of a relevant news item this morning: Went for an annual cardiac review appointment at my GP's yesterday with the practice nurse - blood and urine tests, blood pressure, weight and  lifestyle assessment. First on the tick list was the flu vaccine which was available there and then, if I chose to have it. I declined and gave my reasons for doing so when asked. I thought that the nurse would have had a glance through my recent medical records and would be aware of my and my family's situation over the past year, so gave a brief explanation  about the decisions I had made and how we were trying to eliminate as many as possible chemicals from our diet and hygiene routines.

Verbalising the Feelings

Image
Awakening each day from drug induced sleep, the terrors of the night scroll through your brain as you begin to surface from the torpor of semi-consciousness. Each fragment of the dormant state that whiled away some hours in physical inactivity begins it's struggle to be foremost in this heightening of lucidity. Your ability to become fully alert restricted by a lethargy that lingers till each wave of worry starts it's journey heightening the sense of dread, without clear reason. A longing to return to sleep becomes unbearable with each grasping, clinging thought, yet what the coming horrors may be stay hidden in the recesses of the soul.

Three and a half days later and The Black Dawg

So, after my post on Sunday declaring that I would blog daily on this issue which has taken over my life recently (again) here we are on Thursday with no sign of a further post since the declaration. Under the guise of "positivity", I will not refer further to this lack of achievement on my part, this week. It is after all a symptom of the condition I find myself in. It is also a symptom, which easily becomes a norm, to castigate oneself for every action and inaction that plants itself in the mind. This is neither healthy nor helpful, though almost inevitable, unfortunately. Further positive thinking which my brain is allowing me to verbalise, is that the medication that I was prescribed a week ago has clearly had a major impact on me and the desired and hoped for effect is obvious - to my family and to me. Being made to feel "useful" by picking up my grandchildren from school and helping with a bedroom blitz at my daughter's house has also been productive

Returning to Medication (after stupidly stopping it )

"Anxiety is one of the most prevalent mental health problems in the UK and elsewhere, yet it is still under-reported, under-diagnosed and under-treated. The experience of anxiety often involves interconnected symptoms and disorders. It is estimated that one in four people in the UK will experience a mental health problem each year, while one in six experience a neurotic disorder such as anxiety or depression. Anxiety disorders are also estimated to affect 3.3% of children and young adults in the UK. "    mentalhealth.org.uk Worrying statistics, for anyone not suffering anxiety, let alone those who are. Any long term reader(s) of this, sporadic blog will know that on numerous occasions since I began this, 8 or 9 years ago, there have been times when I have posted about not being able to write, or even think clearly due to my "mental state"  or me being "bad with my nerves" as my grandmother's condition was described back in those days. My anxie

Memorials to "Terror Victims" - more scare tactics and a good dose of irony

 On top of the hypocrisy and shock tactics being thrown at us by Cameron about the Terror of Terrorism and the "existential threat" to Britain and it's values, we now have an announcement that there is to be a permanent memorial to the victims of the Sousse attack.    There will also be a separate site of remembrance for all Britons who have been victims of overseas terrorism, he has added - almost as an afterthought, as he is more won't to do recently every time he makes a statement. "It is right that we mark and commemorate them and others murdered by terrorists overseas, appropriately and support the loved ones they have left behind in every way we can, " he says. British holidaymakers accounted for 30 of those killed, along with three Irish nationals, two Germans, one Belgian, one Portuguese and a Russian, before the assailant was himself shot dead. The attack has been claimed by the Islamic State group - IS/ /ISIS/ ISIL or which ever politically c

Resting

There’s various types of resting and I suppose it depends on your own disposition on how you go about it. Some people close their eyes and are sleeping within less than five minutes. That must be quite pleasant. Close your eyes and maybe in only half an hour you are awake and refreshed. There are some regimes to this resting time. In hot countries it is clear that the best thing to do in the hottest part of the day is to lay down and keep as still as possible. Work can continue later, when its cooler and more pleasant. Yet here in Britain we never really have that scenario. We have some hot days, but never enough to warrant an afternoon nap to get away from the heat.  I remember when I was about 3 years old being almost forced by my mother to sleep after lunch, though tiredness was the last thing on my mind. She used to sit me on her lap and tell me that I did not need to sleep, just close my eyes for a  while. This seemed a ridiculous notion  to me. I now  realise the thinking behi

An Existential Threat or Cameron's Political Scaremongering ?

The terror attacks which took place last Friday have, understandably, produced a sense of shock and horror around the world.   Any attack which leads to the deaths of innocent people is condemned by the majority of ordinary people as disgusting and preposterous and the nearer to "home" that these deaths are, in general, affect the level of condemnation. The decapitated head of the manager of a US owned transportation company was found near Lyon in France, along with banners said to be bearing Islamic writing. French investigators have said that there are links between the man who did this and Islamic State militants. Soon after that, a bomb ripped through the Al - Sadiq mosque in Kuwait's capital city during Friday prayers, killing 27 people and injuring over 200 others. An affiliate of the Islamic State group have claimed responsibility and the suicide bomber identified as a Saudi citizen who had arrived in Kuwait that morning. Then came the news that a gunm

Bio - metrics : Machine v Man in an Airport Queue

Image
Arriving at Manchester Airport recently to re - enter England / United Kingdom of  Great Britain and Northern Ireland / European Union I was faced with the option  of  two queues for passport control  - EU or Non EU. My passport looks like this and so I do know that I am classed as EU (despite having 2 conversations in the streets in Istanbul about what type of money the British use. It seems that many non EU citizens can not believe that we do not use the Euro and wanted clarification that GBP is still in existence).  I had traveled within the EU using this newly issued passport, but not taken much notice of  the symbol of the bio metric facility on it.    ePassport gates are automated, where a passport reader and camera, rather than a border officer - in theory -  verifies your identity and checks your ‘chipped’ passport. To use the ePassport gates, you must have a ‘chipped’ biometric UK, EU, EEA or Swiss passport.  These ePassports have the biometric logo on the front cover.

Change - Created by the Unreasonable Man ?

How do those of us who try to embrace a philosophy of doing what we believe to be good/right deal with the anger and despair that we feel over the injustices all around us? Would you rather give the world a hug, or a slap in the face?  Would you rather get up there and battle, or leave it alone for the sake of a peaceful life? I am sure that many of us can relate to this. It isn’t just my worry, it’s a human question.  We all fight with our anger over issues in our own lives as well as in the wider world. Often, it leads us to the depths of despair and we feel any effort on our part is futile. So we give up. But anger is a powerful emotion, and when it is channeled properly, it can be a force used to positive affect. Rather than ranting at the world – or worse, allowing the anger to destroy us inside by keeping it hidden, we need to find a way to use it and work for change.  "The reasonable man attempts to adapt himself to the world and the unreasonable man attempts to adapt

One Thumb Is All You Need

Image
So, just when I decided that it's time I really ought to get back to using a pen or pencil instead of a keyboard constantly, I find this function on my phone. Whether it's been available all the time I've had the phone or if it's a new thing, I don't know, but I do know that it's a lot easier and quicker than the memo facility and, whilst there is definitely something to the feel of writing on paper- especially brand new paper and I've got a beautiful new notebook that is crying out to be used -  needs must, as they say and my old age and the conditions it brings with it mean that using one thumb as opposed to a whole hand is a more pleasurable experience.   I understand that I can write, edit, save and share whether online or not so have visions of me tapping out my next best seller (next ??) while sat on a beach, on top of a mountain, in the woods, on a boat ( not likely) or wherever I happen to be when the muse hits me. Yes, I am expecting it to hi

Can We Tell What He Is Yet ?

It's difficult - nay, impossible - to comment about some one and their actions without mentioning their name. In most situations, whether celebratory or distasteful, it is my belief that to name the subject and also provide a picture of that person is both necessary and useful (unless of course by doing so an innocent person is upset or potentially harmed by doing so) In this case, the person I am talking about is the convicted paedophile and  so - called "celebrity" currently serving a prison sentence for his crimes - Rolf Harris. There,  I have written his name once but do not intend to repeat it here or post a photograph. My reason for this is that whilst in no way am I personally involved, I feel let down, tricked and disgusted by this man, as do many of my generation and later generations and do not wish to promote him in any way. In 1968, when I was 10/11 years old I went to the Sunderland Empire with my older sister to watch a show by this man, an artist, s
I have always classed myself as a Jack of All Trades (never mind the "master of none" bit)

You View, He Views, She Views, They View - but I don't View

Image
I've had an intense  (and tense) relationship with BT  - formerly known as British Telecommunications - recently.  I have my phone line, broadband - which is working fine at the moment touch wood - and You View TV with them. The TV package was "sold" to me a good while ago, on a day when I had persuaded myself that £7 a month for a service which not only gives you lots of  TV channels and "Catch Up" but also has the magical ability of recording live television while you go and make a cup of tea and can play it back without you missing any of the "live" bits. Now, I've never been a particularly logical thinker, or technological master. I mean, the remote control itself is a mystery to me apart from the on/off button. My son and son in law will tell you with glee about the time I couldn't get the television in the bedroom to work, only to be told that this was because I had the aerial plugged into the power socket of the freeview box.